I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Randomize
