I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
