I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
