The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
