he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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