Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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