I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
We are all done wearing pants today
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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