She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
