we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
