the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
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