wrigley field is MILF paradise
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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