I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
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