At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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