I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
