just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
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