i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Non-Jews are for practice
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Randomize
