Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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