Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Mom said you looked used
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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