Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
My feet surprised me
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