I think my vagina is haunted
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
and you fell through a lawn chair
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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