Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
