Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
