if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize
