OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize