Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
where are my eyebrows?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
