Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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