pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
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