We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
