That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
