I hate all girls vehemently.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Randomize
