That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
