so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
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