i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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