Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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