i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
