But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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