Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
