I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
