My liver just broke up with me...
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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