Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
