I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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