do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
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