May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
