garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize