kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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