I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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