Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize
