I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
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They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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