remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize