I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
